T-Shirt Talk

ugh. I woke up this morning looking like a redneck. It’s from all of that sun yesterday.
I kind of feel like crap. I don’t know if I got heat stroke, or what. Kind of sluggish, you know. I think I got enough sleep. I woke up at 2 am and ate some animal crackers. Like I’m 5 or something.

The laundry just stopped, so know I have to go fold stupid clothes.

10 minutes later

Well, what do you know. 5 black socks. Must be lunch time for the dryer. For some reason they like socks. Why don’t they like those hideous t-shirts that you just won’t throw away?

I have this one t-shirt that says…

The zombies are looking for brains
Don’t worry, you’re safe

It’s black and the print is green and glows in the dark. It uses the Zombie Rot Drippy font. I would take a picture of it, but it’s in the drawer now, and I’m a lazy ass today. I’ll just use this instead.

zombie rot

I have this one grey shirt with an American flag and an eagle on it. That thing is all ripped up. The collar is all frayed. But, I can’t throw it away. It would be like throwing the flag away. It’s not that I’m super-patriotic or anything, but I still can’t do it.

Then there is that one Jimi Hendrix shirt. I ♥ Jimi Hendrix, but the shirt is just awful. It doesn’t even look anything like Jimi Hendrix. It’s airbrushed.

I also have a tie-dyed Scooby Doo shirt. It’s horrid. Sometimes I put it on and go, “I’m going to wear this today”. And then I look in the mirror and go, “Oh hell no!”

Most of my wardrobe consists of t-shirts…and polo shirts. A variegation of polo shirts. Black, brown, navy, tan, dark blue, light blue, azure, teal, royal purple, lavender, turquoise, red, cerise, yellow, ecru, beige, white. But, for work, I’m only permitted to wear black or white. Unless it’s a holiday season. Then I can wear appropriate colors. Red or green for Christmas. Red or blue for patriotic holidays like Memorial Day or the 4th of July.

One time I arranged the polo shirts in my closet according to color. That last for about 5 minutes.

I have a lot of Call of Duty and comic book shirts. I got them at Kohl’s because they’re so cheap. 90% off. What a deal! And they come in their own can.  Cans that I use to keep tea light candles in.

That’s just a sample.

Anyway, so much for me and my fashionista  self.



Categories: The Bob Files

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