Last night I had to do window clings at work. I have to do it every month because nobody else will. They either take too long, or it looks like crap because of all of the air bubbles and wrinkles, or they start crying in frustration and just quit.
It’s not that bad. I do it all of the time.
First you spray down the window with water. Then take the back off of the cling. Spray down the back of the cling (Only if it’s hot, or humid. If it’s cold outside you don’t have to). Climb the ladder and center the cling. Smooth out all of the wrinkles and bubbles with a squeegie (This is the part when people get frustrated. It’s not that bad if you know the secrets. Which they don’t). Climb down and take a look to make sure that it’s not crooked. If it is, then scream and do it again. If it looks okay then move on to the next one.
Sometimes the clings are weird shaped and it’s harder to center them. Last month I had a bunch of stupid pinwheels and strange geometric forms.
It’s easiest to do them when it’s about 40-50 degrees outside. If it’s below freezing, then the water freezes on the window before you get a chance to put up the cling. Plus the cling gets kind of frozen and just slides all over the place.
If it’s too hot, like in the 90s, then the clings get kind of melty. It’s like wadded up saran wrap that’s all sticking to itself. It sucks. Plus, the water evaporates before you can put them up.
I’ve put them up it’s raining, storming, snowing, hailing, sleeting, and really windy. The rain actually kind of helps. The wind? Forget about it.
Before you put them up, you have to take the old ones down. In the winter, the static in them is so bad that you can feel a charge go from your hand to the bottom of your foot; because of the static electricity. You can actually feel sparks in your foot. It’s so weird. Sometimes, it hurts. So, I always try to be careful.
Sometimes, people will come along and try to talk to you.
What are you doing? Washing the windows?
You’re balanced precariously on the fifth rung of a ladder – trying not to fall and break a hip – and they want to start gabbing.
Or, they’ll start asking you questions about stuff that’s on the cling.
So, how much is that chair that’s on there?
I’m sure I don’t know. If you do INSIDE the store, someone will help you.
Anyway, I’m finished with them until next month. Or whenever some other event may come along.
Categories: The Bob Files